Entry 297: My Name’s Tim

Hi there,

My name is Tim



That sad sack running for his life…

The one with the chainsaw maniac chasing him…

That’s me.


It ends badly for me!


You might be saying

Tim, that had to hurt!

Especially the part where he ripped through your innards!

I’m here to tell you

It quite did


Boy am I ever glad he did it!


You might say?

I am

Getting torn in half by a chainsaw

Will do that to a man…


Here I stand now

A ghost

Haunting these grounds

I gotta say

It’s not so bad

That dude in the mask that murdered me

Once came back

I said, Hi, my names Tim

You might remember when you murdered me

Way back when?

Long story short,

He got scared & ran

Tripping and landing on the machete he had in his hand

(Good for him for putting some variety in his kills)

Now though,

We’re best friends!

Spirits to the end!

Sometimes we hit the pub

Yes, you can drink in the afterlife

…In case you were wondering…


The drinks here are stronger

Than anything the living can make…

Do I feel bad that I’m dead?

Have you not been paying attention?



The souls I feel bad for are the ones who died

In the worst of times

Souls like Patty

She’s quite sweet

However, she had the worst death I’ve ever seen!

Patty died in her sleep


Like, right?!

Isn’t that the worst?!

How boring is that?!

You can’t go to the local ghostly bar, tavern or pub

Have a pint & when asked how you die

Be like…

*Mocking voice*

I died peacefully in my sleep

I’ll have you know

It’s not a bad way to go!


Nah, you gotta go in & be like

I was chainsawed in half!

A great story by the way

Earns me drinks

Every visit!

Oh look at that,

We must go

Now that we know one another though

Perhaps we can talk again

I’ve got plenty of stories to tell you

My new found friends

If ever you are at Sins Bar

Feel free to find me.

-My Name’s Tim-

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